Safety Planning – Building a Plan Around Your Reality

Step-by-step safety planning guidance for survivors, focused on practical actions you can take before, during, and after leaving.

Safety Planning Checklists

How to Use These Checklists

These checklists offer options you can adapt to your situation. You can use them as a starting point and change or skip anything that does not feel safe or realistic for you.

Safety planning is not about making perfect plans. It is about increasing your options and thinking ahead where you can.

You can explore additional support options through resources listed at DV.Support.

Before You Leave

You may want to think about these steps if you are considering leaving but are not ready or able to leave yet.

Documents and Information

• List important documents you may want to bring (or copies of them), such as:
  • Identification (ID card, driver’s licence, passport)
  • Birth certificates (for you and any children)
  • Immigration papers or visas
  • Social security or national insurance numbers
  • Health cards, medical insurance details
  • Bank cards and basic account information
  • Any court orders, legal paperwork, or custody documents
  • Marriage, divorce, or separation documents
  • Car title, registration, or insurance information
• Decide where you could safely store copies (for example: with a trusted person, in a secure email, or in a small hidden place).
• Memorise or safely store:
  • Important phone numbers (trusted friends or family, work, doctor, children’s school)
  • Key addresses you might go to
  • Online account logins that matter most to you

Money and Practical Items

• Consider setting aside small amounts of cash when safe to do so.
• Keep a spare bank card, if you have one, in a safe place away from home if possible.
• Gather or plan how to access:
  • Keys (home, car, work, mailbox, storage unit)
  • Medications for you and any children
  • Glasses, hearing aids, mobility aids, medical devices
  • Basic toiletries and a change of clothes
  • Comfort items for children (toy, blanket, school supplies)

Technology and Digital Safety

• Check which devices your partner has access to (phone, tablet, laptop, smart home devices).
• Review privacy and security settings for:
  • Location sharing on your phone and apps
  • Shared cloud accounts or photo backups
  • Shared email accounts or devices
• Consider creating:
  • A new email account for important communication, if safe
  • New passwords or passcodes that your partner cannot guess
• Think about which devices you might leave behind if they could be used to track you.

Support and Information

• Identify trusted people you might tell about what is happening and what you might need.
• Decide who, if anyone, you would feel comfortable asking to:
  • Hold spare keys, copies of documents, or a packed bag
  • Be an emergency contact
  • Look after children or pets temporarily
• Note safety rules or procedures at your workplace or your children’s school.
• Look up local shelters or safe accommodation options, if this is available in your area.

If You Need to Leave Quickly

Sometimes there is very little time to plan. The following checklists focus on what may help you leave more safely in an emergency.

Emergency Bag (Only If Safe to Prepare)

• Decide if you can safely prepare a small bag. If yes, consider including:
  • Copies of key documents
  • Some cash and/or a bank card
  • Medications and a basic first-aid item (like pain relief)
  • Keys and a list of important phone numbers
  • A change of clothes and basic toiletries
  • Essential items for children (diapers, formula, comfort item)
• Think about where to keep this bag:
  • With a trusted friend or family member
  • At work, if allowed and safe
  • In a place at home your partner is unlikely to search

Quick Exit Steps

• Identify at least two possible places you could go in an emergency (friend, family, public place, or shelter if available).
• Think about the quickest way to get out of your home (doors, windows, routes).
• Plan what you could do if:
  • You have access to a car (where the keys are, where the car is parked).
  • You need to leave on foot or use public transport.
• Keep your phone charged when possible and know how to call emergency services in your area.
• If you can, wear or keep nearby:
  • Sturdy shoes
  • Outerwear appropriate for the weather
  • A small amount of cash

Children and Dependents

• Discuss a simple safety plan with children if it can be done without increasing risk. For example:
  • A safe room or neighbour they can go to
  • A code word or phrase that means “go get help”
• Consider what you would do if you have to leave quickly when children are:
  • At school or childcare
  • With the abusive person
  • With another caregiver
• If you care for older relatives, disabled family members, or pets, think about:
  • Who might be able to help them if you have to leave suddenly
  • Any essential information caregivers would need (medications, allergies)

If You Cannot Leave

There are many reasons it may not be possible or safe to leave right now. It is still possible to think about ways to reduce risk where you can.

Physical Safety Inside the Home

• Notice which rooms feel safer and which feel more dangerous. In general, consider:
  • Trying to move to rooms with an exit, when you can
  • Avoiding rooms with weapons, heavy objects, or no exits, if possible
• Think about where you might go in the home to reduce harm during an incident (for example, a room with a door that locks or where children are present, if that seems to help).
• Consider keeping a phone in a place where you can access it quickly, if safe.

Planning With Children

• If it feels safe and age-appropriate, you may want to:
  • Teach children how to call emergency services and say their full name and address.
  • Agree on a code word or phrase that means they should go to a safer place.
  • Explain that they are not responsible for stopping the abuse.
• Identify safe neighbours or nearby places where children could go, if realistic.

Emotional and Everyday Safety

• Notice early warning signs that an incident may be about to escalate and decide what you might do in those moments.
• Identify activities or spaces that give you small breaks or moments of calm (for example: shower, walk, reading, time outside), where safe.
• Keep important numbers written down somewhere safe in case your phone is lost or taken.
• Think about safe ways to stay connected with supportive people, such as short check-ins or scheduled calls.

Technology While You Stay

• Assume that any shared device or account might be seen by your partner.
• Use private or incognito browsing where possible, understanding it is not always fully hidden.
• Consider using a safer device outside the home (for example: at work or a public library) to seek information, if available and safe.
• Be cautious about posting details of your situation or location on social media.

After You Have Left

Leaving often changes the risks rather than ending them immediately. The following checklists focus on safety and stability after you have left.

Immediate Safety After Leaving

• Consider asking trusted people not to share your new address, phone number, or daily routine.
• Decide who you want to know your new location (if anyone) and who should not know.
• If possible, vary your routines, such as:
  • Routes to work, school, or regular places
  • Times you come and go
• Review any court orders, protective orders, or agreements you may have, and keep copies accessible.
• Keep a written record of concerning incidents (calls, texts, messages, in-person contact), including dates and times, if safe to do so.

Technology and Privacy After Leaving

• Update passwords and security questions for:
  • Email accounts
  • Banking and financial accounts
  • Social media
  • Cloud storage and backup services
• Turn off or review:
  • Location sharing on phones and apps
  • Shared calendars or family tracking apps
  • Access to streaming services or smart home devices your ex-partner might still control
• Check devices (phone, car, tablet) for unfamiliar apps or settings that could track you, if you know how.
• Adjust privacy settings on social media to limit who can see your posts and location.

Children, School, and Work

• Tell schools or childcare providers, if you feel safe doing so:
  • Who is allowed to pick up the children
  • Any court orders in place
  • Who should not have access to the children
• Speak with your workplace, if you feel comfortable, about:
  • Security measures (visitor rules, escorts to parking, phone call screening)
  • Any changes in your schedule or contact information
• Make a plan for what you and others will do if your ex-partner shows up at your work, school, or new home.

Money, Housing, and Ongoing Support

• Open a new bank account, if possible, that your ex-partner cannot access.
• Update your address for:
  • Banking and financial accounts
  • Government benefits or tax agencies
  • Health care providers
  • Schools and employers
• Check what benefits, housing support, or legal protections might be available in your area.
• Consider connecting with:
  • Local domestic abuse services or advocacy organisations
  • Legal information sources about your rights
  • Support groups, if accessible and comfortable

Taking Care of Yourself After Leaving

• Notice what helps you feel calmer or more stable, such as:
  • Regular sleep and meals where possible
  • Short walks or gentle movement
  • Spending time with supportive people
  • Quiet time or routines that feel grounding
• Plan small, manageable steps for each day rather than trying to solve everything at once.
• Allow yourself to seek professional support (such as counselling or health care) if and when it feels right for you.

Recommended Articles

• Recognizing Different Types of Abuse
• Digital and Technology Safety in Abusive Relationships
• Checklist: Recording and Storing Evidence Safely
• Supporting Children Who Witness Abuse
• Leaving, Separation, and Legal Protections Overview